Perimenopause and Menopause: What no one talks about
Thank the universe for Oprah Winfrey. Before Oprah began talking about menopause, it was really never heard of. Despite Oprah and new resources being offered, menopause is still taboo. It is misrepresented, misunderstood, and easy to push to the side. Here’s what you should know:
There is no such things as pre- or post-menopause. Perimenopause is the term we use when a woman experiences symptoms (common symptoms are hot flashes, sleepless nights, and mood changes). It’s usually 10 years later that menopause comes and stays. Menopause means a woman is no longer fertile. It will never go away. A woman will be in menopause the rest of her life.
Many of my clients have described perimenopause as “power taken away”. They compare perimenopause to a second puberty. They mourn that the first puberty gave them power and beauty and perimenopause was opposite.
What I notice right away is that these clients go through perimenopause alone. Their partners tell them “Stop being such a bitch” and their children roll their eyes and leave the room.
I argue that perimenopause is a sexist problem before it is a medical problem. We have medication for ED that works like a charm. We have medication for migraines, menstrual cramps, and broken femurs. But we are just barely looking into medication for perimenopause symptoms.
Why have we pushed perimenopause to the side and forced women to face it alone? Is it because we first made her in charge of all of our emotions? Is it because we first took away her rights? Is it because we don’t teach emotional regulation to boys?
The greatest advocate a woman has in perimenopause is herself. But it would feel a lot better if husbands, partners, doctors, and children were advocates too, right? I know so. It’s what I’m fighting for as a professional. And the reason I’m fighting for it is because women deserve more than what they get. The world will be a safer place when women are taken care of.
Services Offered with Katherine Linscott, LMFT
Are you a mother heading toward an empty nest? Are you already in an empty nest and figuring out new dynamics with your adult children? Therapy with Katherine Linscott, LMFT can help you work toward finding your identity and purpose outside of caregiving. I provide Grief Therapy for those experiencing perimenopause, distance from partner or children, and loss of Self. I also provide Therapy for Women for women 45+ who struggle with purpose, burnout, perimenopause, and stress of feeling unappreciated. For more about me, check out my About Page, Blog, or Homepage.